


A Useless Crush

by ellekay



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: High School AU, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, hux has a huge crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-01
Updated: 2016-06-01
Packaged: 2018-07-11 12:19:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7050667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellekay/pseuds/ellekay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brendol Hux Sr. has a bad habit of pressuring his son into befriending other kids for his own business gains. Hux has a bad habit of doing it, no questions asked. So Ben Organa, the senator's son fresh from Dr. Snoke's Troubled Youth Center, is an easy target. But Hux is getting more than he bargained for with someone so useless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Useless Crush

Art by [doodlingthingies](doodlingthingies.tumblr.com)

Brendol Hux II woke up to his alarm at 6:00AM in utter disbelief. It felt like he had just closed his eyes moments ago, but it seemed it was already time to wake up. He slapped his clock and sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes. He gave himself just a moment to sit still and breathe before he kicked off his covers and headed for the shower.

At 6:35, he was dressed in his last pair of clean jeans and a sweater, hair combed neatly into place, extremely full backpack over his shoulder. He descended the stairs of his house and drop the bag off by the door before heading to the kitchen.

“Morning, Father,” he said, voice still thick from sleep. Brendol Hux Sr. glanced up from his tablet briefly before looking back down.

“Good morning, Brendol.” He let the silence pass between them as the younger Hux moved around the kitchen, preparing his coffee and toast. Once he finally sat down, Hux’s father turned off his tablet and looked up.

“My flight leaves at 10. I should only be ten days, but you know how these things usually go.”

“Of course,” Hux murmured.

“I’ve emailed you my itinerary, but there should be plenty of money loaded on your card to keep you fed until I get back.” Hux’s father took a sip of his coffee and settled back in his chair. “I also wanted to let you know, Senator Organa’s son is starting school this morning.”

“I thought you were at odds with Senator Organa,” Hux said evenly.

“You’re not wrong. He could be a useful person for you to know. I’m not sure where he was attending school before this, but he’s on track to graduate in time. That seems odd to me.” He fixed Hux with a calculating look. “Anything that would distract Senator Organa from the regulations she’s trying to pass would be helpful to me.”

“I’ll see what I can find out.”

“Thank you, Brendol.” His father gave him a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. Hux returned to his toast and coffee, finishing them in silence while his father returned to his reading. He took his dishes to the sink when he was done.

“Have a safe flight, Father,” he said with a small smile. “I hope your proposal goes over well.”

“So do I. Stay focused today.”

“Yes, sir.”

\---

Not only did Ben Organa-Solo start school that day, he happened to be in most of Hux’s classes. He was forced to do the customary “introduce yourself to the class” routine, which he grumbled out a hasty routine of his name and one or two innocuous hobbies (listening to music and drawing). It gave Hux a chance to get a good look at him. He was ludicrously tall and seemed acutely aware of it, slouching down as low as possible and ducking his head. He had a black leather cuff around one wrist and an assortment of bracelets around the other, chipped black polish on his nails, and untamed curly hair.

“Do you have anything else you want to add?” Ms. Aarons asked. She was trying so hard to engage him.

“Not really,” he said quietly. He went back to his chair when he was allowed, opened up to a blank page in his notebook, and began scribbling something Hux couldn’t see from where he was sitting. He opened his own notes, making mental ones about Ren as he started his work for the day.

_He certainly doesn’t look like a senator’s son._ Hux knew that stereotypes were a weak form of assessment, but as stereotypes went, Ben Organa-Solo didn’t touch the thing.

Hux went about his day as usual, keeping his peripheral focus on Ben. The two of them had the same second period class, which meant they had the same lunch block. Hux felt he had a fairly good read on Ben, so he decided to attempt to make contact.

He found him at a circular table by himself, picking at a Cup O’ Noodles. _Unsurprising_ , Hux thought. Ben looked as though he would bite anyone who came near him. Fortunately, Hux wasn’t afraid of being bitten.

“Ben?” he said politely, even meekly. He gave the other boy a small, sort of shy smile when he looked up sharply. “I’m Hux, I saw you in my last two classes and thought I’d say hello. Mind if I sit down?”

When Ben didn’t say anything, Hux gave himself permission to sit, setting his heavy bag next to Ben’s equally heavy one. He unzipped a pocket and pulled out his lunch, which was a single protein bar.

“How are you liking it here so far?” he asked mildly. Ben gave his fork a little twirl in his noodles, glaring back down at them before answering.

“Beats being kicked in the teeth, I guess.”

“Well, I wouldn’t go that far. I’ve never been kicked in the teeth, but I think I’d prefer it to high school.” He took a bite out of his bar and chewed thoughtfully, watching Ben’s lips quirk up in some semblance of amusement that didn’t touch his eyes.

“What do you want?” he asked, voice harsh. Hux wasn’t sure how to answer that, so he shrugged.

“I’m just trying to be friendly.”

“No, you aren’t.”

Hux fixed him with a penetrating stare, calculating and cautious. He held Ben’s glare for another moment before dropping his gaze to his protein bar again.

“What are you listening to?”

“Interpol,” he snapped. “Look, I know why you’re here. You heard about the freak show senator’s kid and want to know all about Dr. Snoke’s Troubled Youth Center and if it’s true that a kid died or if they really put a chip in my brain or whatever.” His voice had taken on a furious, hissing quality as this little speech went on. “I’m not fucking interested in doing this, not with you or anyone else, Hux. You can tell that to anyone who asks. I’m just here to get my fucking diploma and get the hell out of here.”

Hux stared mildly for a moment at this little outburst. Ben’s eyes were hard and furious, and the longer Hux looked at him without flinching, the angrier Ben seemed to get. For some reason, this pleased Hux immensely. He allowed himself a quick smirk.

“I don’t know anything about Dr. Snoke’s Troubled Youth Center, but a name is a good place to start.” He stood abruptly, picking up his bag and shouldering it with a cold smile. Ben now looked somewhere between furious and terrified, fists clenched on the table. “Thank you for making that easier on me.”

Hux turned his back and walked off without another word, smiling to himself.

\--

The house was dead quiet when Hux got home. He listened closely.

“Hello?”

No response. Brendol Sr.’s flight had left on time.

He dropped his things on the ground immediately, threw a frozen dinner in the microwave, and brought his laptop down to the living room, where he set up with his feet on the coffee table. He had a mountain of homework to do, but he was far more interested in digging up dirt on Ben Organa-Solo than any of that. He was used to doing petty things like this for his father, but the ease with which he’d antagonized his new classmate had given him an unexpected thrill. There was something incredibly appealing about his jaw tensing, the way his eyes rimmed with red.

Hux happily pulled up a Google search bar and typed in Dr. Snoke’s Troubled Youth Center. It pulled up a now-defunct website and a handful of articles. Hux spent only a moment on the center’s website, as it now contained zero information that he needed. He read all of the articles that came up as closely as possible. The first claimed Dr. Snoke was now awaiting trial on charges of neglect, abuse, and fraud. None of his former “students” were named, presumably for their own protection, but the article mentioned that after a SWAT raid, many of them were transported to a local hospital to treat injuries not sustained in the raid.

Hux picked at his gummy fettuccini alfredo as he read, chewing his lip. He’d heard of places like this before. Reform camps for maladjusted youths that turned out to be horrifying scams. Parents paid exorbitant amounts of money for “professionals” to help them bring their children to heel, and in return, their children were emotionally and physically abused for the duration of their stay. Hux had been threatened with military school before, but this was an entirely different animal.

Setting down his half eaten pasta, Hux picked up his phone and paged through until he found a contact titled “Captain”. He clicked it and waited.

“Hi, this is Phasma. Leave a message.”

“Hello, darling, it’s me. Call me when you’re back from practice, I have a favor to ask.”

He hung up and stared at his computer for a moment. He’d hit something of a dead end with his research without Phasma’s help. With a resigned sigh, he got up to retrieve his bag and started on his homework.

About two hours later, his phone lit up and a picture of a lovely blonde girl with short hair flipping him off popped up on the screen. He answered quickly.

“Hello, how was practice?”

“Awful. What’s the favor?”

“I need you to look into some medical records for me.”

“That’s illegal.”

“Yes, and that department store on Mirimar surely remembers you for your respect for the law,” Hux said dryly.

“You are such a dick,” Phasma said fondly. “Just email me the details.”

“Already done. Thank you.”

“You owe me.”

“I know. The house is empty, so just call me if you have a freshman to bed or something.”

“Rude. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Be good.”

Hux hung up and looked at his phone a moment. He ought to tell his father what he’d found so far, but after a moment, he decided to wait until he had something actionable. He set his phone down and went back to his homework.

\--

School the next day passed as expected. Ben wasn’t in his first class, but that wasn’t a surprise. His robotics class was a full-year elective, and there were only four people in it. It was one of his only pure joys, even if his father wrote it off as a waste of time.

Hux was mildly surprised not to see Ben at all that day, though. For some reason, he thought he was disappointed about it, but that seemed silly.

He ran into Phasma toward the end of the day, approaching her at her locker, where she seemed to have one of her younger cheerleaders hanging on her every word. Hux waited patiently for them to finish talking just out of earshot. Phasma noticed him standing there after a moment, and dismissed her younger friend with a little finger tap on the nose. The girl blushed and walked away in a slight daze. Hux shook his head with a smile, raising one eyebrow at Phasma.

“Freshman?”

“Sophomore, thank you very much. I have some standards.”

“I’m shocked,” he said, falling into step with her as they headed for the front door together. She was about four inches taller than him, so he had to walk very quickly to keep up with her. “Did you find anything?”

“I didn’t have time last night. I’ll look tonight and get it all to you tomorrow.”

“That’s fine. No practice?”

“No. I thought I’d go to the gym, but I really should catch up on my homework.”

“That makes two of us.” Hux pushed the door open for her. “I’m sure I’ll see you tomorrow.”

\---

Hux didn’t get Phasma’s email until about midnight, when he was climbing into bed.

_Here’s everything I could find_ , it said. _Medical records were under his dad’s last name, kind of clever. What’s this for? Are you finally going to start dating? –P_

Hux smiled at the screen and shut his phone off. He’d look through everything tomorrow, but he would sleep well knowing he had something tangible to give his father.

\---

Wednesday hit as Wednesdays often did for Hux, for some reason. He slept right through his alarm, skipped his shower and breakfast, and still arrived at school five minutes late. He slipped into class as covertly as possible, earning himself only a slight glare from Ms. Aarons. He accidentally caught Ben’s eye as he walked over to his desk, but they didn’t hold the fury Hux was expecting. He looked more like a beaten puppy than anything.

Hux fought like hell to stay awake through the entire class and barely managed. As he was dazedly picking up his things, a looming presence approached his desk. He looked up to see Ben standing unreasonably close to him.

“Can I talk to you alone?” Hux winced slightly at how loudly he said it. There were still other people filing out of the room.

“I was under the impression you didn’t want to talk to me at all,” Hux said coolly, packing his books away and standing.

“I just need a couple of minutes,” Ben said, looking for all the world like he was trying to hide behind his hair. Hux sized him up for a moment before nodding his head in the direction of the door. Ren followed him out and down the hallway to a quiet corner.

“What do you want?” Hux sighed, turning to face Ben. The taller boy shrunk visibly, picking at his bracelets.

“Look,” he said, after a brief silence. “I’m sorry that I snapped at you.”

“I forgive you,” Hux said tersely. Ben gave him a wary look through his eyelashes that hit Hux somewhere in the pit of his stomach for reasons he couldn’t articulate.

“Please don’t mention what I said to anyone. I can’t… I can’t switch schools again. I just need to finish so that I can move away and stop being a problem. I’ll do anything, just please. Keep that between us.”

Hux’s eyebrow quirked up at the word anything, but he didn’t reply to Ben immediately.

“Well, Ben, I--”

“Please,” Ben said sharply. He quickly adjusted his tone to something more polite. “Please don’t call me that. It’s Kylo Ren.”

“Kylo Ren.” Hux blinked.

“Yes.”

“Right. Well, Ren. I don’t have any proof that you were at that reform school aside from your own word. Not yet, anyway. But I have my ways, and I’m curious as to how you think you’re going to keep me from using that information to my advantage.”

“I… didn’t really have anything in mind,” Ren said awkwardly, scratching at the back of his head. “I’m not really good at anything.”

“Hey, Brendol!” Hux closed his eyes briefly and reopened them, leaning around Ren. Derrel Cornellis was walking up the hallway toward them. He was about a foot shorter than Ren but at least as muscular, if not more so. He feigned a tight smile at him and adjusted his body language to something a little more fluid, a little less like himself.

“Hello, Cornellis,” Hux said, injecting something syrupy-sweet that he hated into his voice. He glanced at Ren, who had redirected all of his focus to Cornellis, eyes full of terse annoyance. Cornellis gave him a jerking nod of his head.

“Who’s this?”

“This is, ah… Kylo Ren. He’s recently transferred here.”

Cornellis already seemed to have given up on Ren, moving closer to Hux and leaning against the wall between the two of them.

“I wanted to let you know, my parents are going to be out of town in two weeks and I’m having a party that Saturday.”

“Two weeks?” Hux frowned. “Are they going to the Orion Summit?”

“Yeah, they mentioned they’d be seeing your dad.” His lips pulled into an infuriating smirk. Hux masked his unease at the implication and smiled back.

“Excuse me,” Ren cut in abruptly. Cornellis turned around like a fly had been bothering him. “You don’t need to stand so close to him.”

“Ren, it’s fine,” Hux said, a hint of warning in his voice. “Plan on seeing me there,” he added sweetly, grabbing Cornellis’ arm to redirect his focus. He’d rather not see these two kill each other in the hallway.

“Cool,” he said, still perturbed by Ren, but clearly having gotten what he wanted. “I’ll catch you in Bio.” He threw another look Ren’s way before giving Hux a wink and walking away.

Hux relaxed his posture and sighed, face resuming full annoyance.

“Who the fuck is that?” Ren asked harshly.

“What? Oh, that’s Cornellis. Our parents are friends.”

“I gathered that much, why do you talk to him?”

Hux blinked at Ren as if he’d never even considered the question before.

“He’s got a little crush on me, and his parents are real estate developers. My father needs their signatures to complete his proposal.” Ren stared at him, completely nonplussed. “I may as well indulge him until it’s complete.”

“I see,” Ren said, clearly disliking the answer.

“Anyway…” Hux said, trying to get them back on topic.

“You mentioned the Orion Summit,” Ren said. “My mother flew out yesterday. That’s what this is about.” He tilted his head ever so slightly, scrutinizing Hux. “You can dig up whatever you want about me, spread any rumors you want, because she doesn’t give a shit about me. If I died tomorrow, she’d probably put my body on ice until she had time for a funeral. I’d prefer you didn’t, but I can’t stop you.” He glanced down the hallway. “Though, based on that little performance just now, I have a feeling you’re not going to do anything that doesn’t help daddy get ahead.”

Ren stalked off before Hux could get another word in. He stood there for a moment, unsure of whether or not to run after him and make some vague threat, but it seemed pointless.

A bell rang abruptly, startling him out of his confusion and reminding him that he was already late for his next class.

\----

Hux spent his night ignoring his homework and pouring over the information Phasma had sent him. Something about it felt desperately invasive, but it didn’t stop him from reading over the medical reports, looking at pictures.

There were photographs of untreated burns, weeks old. Bruises, some fresh and some turning yellow with age, peppered his body and face. Something about his eyes sent shivers up and down Hux’s spine every time he dared to meet them. Worse than that, he felt some kind of awful anger about how Ren had been treated burning from the inside, an anger he didn’t fully understand.

One picture in particular haunted him. It was a shot of Ren under a harsh fluorescent light, staring into the camera. There was a nasty bruise around his eye and his lip was split, but what truly frightened Hux was the emptiness in his eyes.

After a couple of hours of looking over the files, Hux rubbed his hand over his face and knocked back the rest of his cold coffee.

There was something about this idiot.

He went to bed that night, restless and annoyed with himself, haunted by the image of Ben Organa-Solo who calls himself Kylo Ren.

……………..

\--

The next day, Hux did a brilliant job of ignoring Ren all day, right up until lunch time. He stared hard at Ren, who was obliviously eating his Cup O’ Noodles, until he made a snap decision, pulling something out of his backpack and stomping toward Ren.

Hux dropped the t-shirt unceremoniously on the table in front of Ren, hardly even bothering to look at him.

“My father got me that because of some producer he knows, it's about two sizes too big for me. It should fit you.”

Ben picked it up and inspected it, quirking an eyebrow at Hux.

“Are you trying to be nice?”

“Please. You're my last stop before a thrift store, don't feel special.”

Ben's face shifted slowly into something that might have resembled a smile.

“You are such a dick.”

“Yes, well. You mentioned Interpol the first time we talked, I assumed you would like that.”

Ren made an absolute embarrassment of himself by pulling on the t-shirt over his clothes and looking down at it. It was nothing special, just a generic band t-shirt, but he smiled down at it like his face was going to break.

“I do like it,” he said, smiling wryly up at Hux. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it. Please.” Hux dropped into the seat across from Ren and pulled out his protein bar. “I’m not going to cause any trouble for you,” he announced off-handedly. Ren peered at him. “You’re right, it’s not going to do me any good if your mother doesn’t actually care.”

“Right,” Ren said, smiling even though this should have been a painful statement to hear. He adjusted the t-shirt over his original shirt before he pulled his headphones off all the way.

“Let’s go get lunch somewhere else. I’m sick of eating these and those bars are awful.” He threw his noodles in the general direction of a trash can and managed to land it inside, surprising Hux immensely.

“We don’t have time before third period,” Hux said warily. Ren shrugged.

“It’s not like I’m ever going to use Calculus.”

Hux regarded Ren with a squint, chewing the bite in his mouth thoughtfully. He swallowed it before crushing the rest of it in his fist.

“Fine,” he said. “But we’re taking my car. I’m assuming yours is garbage.”

“Are you kidding?” Ren said giddily. “I don’t even have a car.”

Hux rolled his eyes and dropped the miserable protein bar in the trash on the way to the front door.

\--  
The next two weeks were some of the strangest of Hux’s life. It seemed Ren was not used to having friends, so he just threw out any emotion or suggestion that entered his head. Hux found this simultaneously annoying and endearing.

“There's a She Wants Revenge show three hours from here tomorrow, do you want to go?”

“No, Ren.”

“Why? I thought you said you liked them.”

“I do, but it's also a Thursday and I have school. I was under the impression you did too.”

“I'm trying to graduate, not excel. Missing one day isn't going to tank my GPA.” But he slumped over his homework again nonetheless, creasing Hux's sheets as he rolled onto his back to read. Hux felt a pull in his stomach at the sight, but ignored it as best he could.

That was another troublesome thing about Ren. He was overwhelmingly attractive to Hux. He thought about it as he tried to focus on his biology homework; how appealing he found his crooked smile and his wild hair. Hux's father would disown him if he ever let his hair get it that long, which only made it more alluring. Hux chewed his lower lip and snuck a backward glance at Ren, only to find him staring at him.

“Have you forgotten how to read, Ren?” he snapped. Ren scoffed at him and went back to what he was doing.

Yes, Hux was in a great deal of trouble.

\-----

Hux knocked back his second coffee of the day just as he arrived as his locker, tossing the empty paper cup in the trash nearby before opening the locker and beginning to pile his books inside.

“Hey, General.” Hux glanced up to see his very least favorite person, Ren. He was wearing what Hux assumed was his only pair of jeans and the Interpol t-shirt Hux had given him last year. He rolled his eyes at the nickname and went back to what he was doing.

“Are you ever going to give up that wretched nickname?” he asked.

“Probably not. That was the most brutally efficient game of dodgeball I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“Yes, well, someone had to step up or we would have been murdered.”

“Right you are, General Hux.”

Hux sighed and closed his locker.

“Shut up, Ren. Are you actually going to English today? I don’t imagine you’ve done the reading.” He started walking in the direction of his first class, Ren falling into easy step next to him.

“Please. I read _Watership Down_ in freshman year, it sucked then and it’ll suck now.”

“Well, then, you can come along and feed me your notes on it, I didn’t have time last night,” Hux groaned. “This student council bullshit is killing me, I don’t have time for anything anymore.”

“I hate to repeat myself, but have you thought about--”

“Yes, Ren,” Hux snapped. “I can’t drop out of it, my father won’t let me.” They came to a halt outside of the classroom. They were early, as Hux preferred to be. Ren leaned against the wall, picking at his nail polish.

“You know, you could consider _not_ doing everything your dad tells you to. You’re 18, he can’t really stop you.”

“You know what amazes me about you? It’s that you actually think life works that way,” Hux said tiredly, checking his phone. He saw he had a text from his father and tucked it away with a small sigh of exasperation. “I may not like the old bastard, but I still live under his roof and he’s still paying for me to go to college next semester.”

“Hm,” was all Ren said. “Well. Maybe you should drop out of,robotics then.” He cocked his head at Hux. “You look like you haven’t slept in a week.”

“Yes, well, I’ll sleep tonight. I’m not planning on sticking around Cornellis’ party for very long tonight.”

“Oh my God, Hux, just skip it. He’s a tool.”

“I’m aware that he’s a tool, I’m not going because I want to,” Hux said wearily. Ren rolled his eyes. He looked like he wanted to continue bickering, but the classroom door opened, effectively sealing his doom of having to go to class. He glared at Hux, who gave him a triumphant smirk as they went in together. “I told you, I need your notes.”

“I hate you, Hux.”

“I hate you too, Ren.”

___

Hux let himself into his empty house around four, with Ren trailing behind him.

“This is one hell of a business trip your dad is on,” Ren said as he sat down to unlace his boots. Hux untied his own shoes and pulled off his sweater. “What is it, three weeks now?”

“Yes, it’s been extended twice.” Hux said as he led the way up the stairs. Hux glanced back to make sure Ren had taken his boots off; the last thing he needed was to have to vacuum the house again. He entered his bedroom and dropped his bag on his bed. His room would have been equally sparse, were it not for a handful of band posters spaced out along one wall, as well as a handful of blueprints scattered across his desk.

Ren flung himself on the bed next to Hux’s bag, bouncing a little.

“Why am I here again?” he said, flopping onto his back. Hux glanced away quickly when he noticed that Interpol t-shirt hiking up over Ren’s hips.

“You are going to fail your Civ final if you don’t get into gear. You’re here so I can help you study.”

“So,” Ren said, sitting up, “what you’re saying is you already have too much to do but you’re taking on my academic career on top of all of it?”

“Do you want to be trapped in high school for another year?” Hux asked, one eyebrow arched. Ren shrugged a little and opened his mouth to speak. “Let me add that you would also very likely be trapped with your parents for another year.” That closed Ren’s mouth, and he fixed Hux with a glare.

“I’m not even close to failing,” he mumbled, even as he reached down into his bags to get his books. Hux allowed himself a private eyeroll before he slid his blueprints to one side of his desk to give himself space to work.

Hux and Ren managed to stay focused for two full hours before Ren started complaining about being hungry at a volume and frequency Hux couldn’t ignore anymore. He pinched the bridge of his nose and looked over at the clock.

“I can feed you, but we have to leave after that. I have that miserable party to go to.” He slid his notes into his Civ text book and snapped it shut while Ren rolled off of the bed, landing on his feet with his customary confusing grace.

“Just don’t go, Hux.” His voice was just this side of whining. “The house is empty, we could be eating Chinese food and listening to the new playlist I made you on your dad’s huge sound system.”

“You’ve made me another one?” Hux asked, standing and stretching. “I’d thought you’d given up on trying to correct my taste in music.”

“I’ll give up when I’m dead. Can I crash this party, or are you taking me home?”

“I’d better take you home. I’m supposed to socialize, not spend all night with the loser Organa kid.” Ren glanced away quickly. Hux thought for a second he might have upset him, but he pulled out his phone and looked completely passive.

“That’s fine. I just demand a crack at that sound system before your dad comes home,” he said as he clicked at his phone.

“Well, at this rate he’ll just move to DC, so I’m sure I can oblige.”

\--------------

Hux found his way to Cornellis and his friends pretty easily. He took a sip out of his red plastic cup to soothe his nerves. It tasted like cola and paint thinner, but it did the job. He rolled his neck and checked his phone before he approached. He had one text, from Ren.

Are you still there? Text me when you get home i want to talk to you.

Hux rolled his eyes and tucked his phone into his pocket as he saw Cornellis approaching, sporting a pair of red cups identical to the one he was holding.

“Looks like you’re getting low,” he smirked. Hux glanced down at his mostly full cup and held back a comment about how Cornellis clearly didn’t have eyes, accepting the second drink with a gracious smile.

“Thank you. Excellent party.”

“Hey, thanks. Glad you were able to make it. I was kind of worried, you’ve been spending so much time with that weird Organa kid. Thought you might skip out.”

Hux shrugged breezily.

“He’s a senator’s son, you know. It’s part selfish, part pity.”

“You’re a saint, Hux.” Cornellis took a sip of his drink. Hux set down the old one and drank from the one he’d been given. “I heard he was in some fucked-up boot camp.” Hux’s grip on the cup tightened slightly.

“I don’t really care, honestly. But he’s never brought it up.”

Cornellis shrugged.

“Shit cheerleaders say, right?”

“Right.” Hux took a big gulp of his drink. This one tasted even worse. He chalked it up to Cornellis being generally useless at everything except lifting heavy things. The two of them made their way over to some of his other friends, and Hux half-listened to their conversation as his phone vibrated persistently in his pocket. _Not now, Ren,_ he thought irritably.

Suddenly, halfway through a blonde girl debating her friend about whether or not Phasma had actually shoplifted a television, Hux noticed his vision blurring.

“Mm,” he groaned abruptly. He reached up to rub at his eyes, but that motion alone made him dizzy. _Have I been drinking too much?_ he thought, but he’d never felt this awful from drinking before now. He swayed into Cornellis on accident, who caught him with minimal fuss.

“Whoa, jeez, Hux. Pregaming?” His breath was hot against Hux’s face as he laughed.

“No, I’m-- I haven’t…”

“Hey, no shame in being a lightweight.” He looked up at his friends. “I’m gonna get him some water, I’ll be back.”

“I’m fine,” he protested weakly. Cornellis dragged him along and he walked as best he could. His head felt like it was under water, his whole body weighed down like lead. People and shapes and noises passed him in blurs, and suddenly it was dark and he was horizontal.

“You’re a piece of work, Brendol,” he heard Cornellis say, somewhere above him. He let his head fall to the side, trying to stop the spinning. He had a vague sense that he was in danger and needed to leave immediately. “You string me along all year and expect me not to notice? I’m not stupid.”

Hux felt a hysterical laugh building in his chest that had no way to escape out of his mouth. He felt hands on him, moving his clothes, and he managed to filter in a few details.

_This is going to happen, apparently._

_You don’t have any way to stop it._

_You’re not going to say anything about it._

He closed his eyes and tried to be anywhere else, but a sudden crash brought him back to the present.

Someone was shouting. There were more crashes. Hux lifted his arms and felt that there was no one on top of him. He pushed himself up, laboriously, and looked around for the source of the commotion. His vision was still blurry, but he recognized Ren’s voice, howling with inarticulate rage.

“Ren…” he said weakly, unsure what he was looking for. “Ren!”

He felt himself being pulled upward and suddenly he was moving very fast. His mind managed to verify that Ren was holding him, that he was shaking, and that he was leaving very fast.

\--

It could have been hours later, for all Hux knew. His head pounded violently, like a drummer was playing a tattoo against the inside of his skull. He sat up as best he could and opened his eyes, looking around. He was in the passenger seat of a truck. Ren was next to him, breathing hard through his nose. There was something dark on his knuckles, contrasting with the sheet-white color they’d turned from gripping the steering wheel.

“What the hell happened…” Hux mumbled.

“You weren’t texting back. I borrowed my dad’s truck to make sure you were okay. I found you… he drugged you.”

“Obviously, he drugged me,” Hux said. Ren glanced at him sharply, as if he had no right to be annoyed. His jaw worked furiously before he spoke again.

“I didn’t think you’d want to stick around. Sorry.”

“You have no idea how hard you've just made things for me, Ren,” Hux groaned.

“Gee, sorry I didn't let you get raped,” Ren snapped, getting out of the car abruptly. Hux's head throbbed, but he pursued Ren anyway, clutching at the handle desperately.

“Get back here, Ren. Do you think I have a choice in this? That I want to be at the mercy of people like him? I don't have any say, I don't even make friends unless he says I can--”

“I'm not stupid!” Ren shouted suddenly, and for a moment, Hux could see why other people were afraid of Ren. His hands were balled into fists at his side, so tight that his arms were shaking, and his eyes were alive with fury. Hux took a step back in spite of himself, forgetting all of the things he had planned on saying. “I know you're only friends with me because of my mother, I'm not an idiot. But I'm trying to help you anyway and you're being such a stubborn prick about it.”

Hux laughed harshly. It sounded hysterical to his ears.

“You are stupid, Ren. Do you really think my family has any use for someone like you? The fuck-up not even reform camp could correct?” His face contorted into an ugly sneer. “You're completely useless--”

“Then why the fuck are you still here, Hux?”

Hux opened his mouth to spit something vitriolic back at Ren, drive the knife home, but no sound came out. He closed it again and held Ren’s stare, but he could already feel his expression betraying him. Some hideous cocktail of exhaustion and emotion and adrenaline was mixing in his blood and turning his face the soft pink that he hated. Ren waited for an answer, glowering and shaking, but the raw edges of his fury seemed to be softening as he watch Hux’s face crumble. At last, Hux opened his mouth again, his voice coming out shaken and cracked.

“I don't know,” he said quietly, attempting to infuse the words with some disgust and failing. “You're too loud, you waste your time and talent on things that don't matter, you get me into trouble constantly, I just.” His voice was barely more than a whisper now, and his crossed his arms over his chest as if it could keep the flood of what he felt for Ren in. He tried to say I hate you but he knew he couldn't make Ren believe it. His cheeks were hot and pink and he prayed to every god he'd ever ignored that Ren couldn't see that in the dim light from the street lamp.

Ren stepped forward, into Hux’s space, eyes still hard with anger, but it was fading fast. Hux recoiled a little, pulling his arms tighter around his chest.

“It’s just me, Hux,” he said quietly. “You don’t have to lie your way around me like you do with everyone else.”

Ren’s proximity created a whole new set of problems for Hux, and he bit down on a whimper when he imagined doing exactly what he wanted; collapse into his solid chest, pull in two fistfuls of that stupid Interpol shirt he wore three times a week, let out the breath that had been coiling in his chest for the last two weeks and just let himself have this.

Perhaps it was the alcohol, or whatever Cornellis had slipped into his drink, but he found himself doing exactly that.

Ren jumped a little as Hux’s collided with him, silent and grasping at him. Hux waited for Ren to pull him off and shout at him and get in his father’s truck and leave. Perhaps this was the easiest way to sever this connection he couldn’t have, just lay out the true, repulsive nature of his feelings for Ren.

Ren didn’t shove him away, though. Hux felt, miraculously, Ren’s lean, powerful arms wrap around his frame. He shrank down into the embrace and closed his eyes. He was so tired. So tired, in fact, that he must have imagined Ren’s nose in his hair. Everything seemed to drain out of him at once, all of his energy and emotion melting away in Ren’s arms.

“I need you to take me home,” he murmured.

“Okay,” Ren said simply.

“I need to pick up my car.”

“Tomorrow.”

“Mm. You’re right. Can’t drive like this.”

“I know.”

Hux felt very light, suddenly, and then he felt a warm darkness close around him all at once, dragging him down into the sleep he’d fought off so valiantly.

\--

Hux woke the next day in his own bed, but he was immediately and acutely aware that he was not alone. He glanced down at the arm around his waist and knew it was Ren’s. He sat up abruptly and jerked away from Ren. He was dressed in the clothes he wore to Cornellis’ party still, and Ren was dressed too, his jacket draped over Hux’s chair.

Details of the previous night started to come to him, along with a splitting headache. He dug his palms into his eyes and groaned as Ren started to wake up.

“Do you just invite yourself into people’s beds all the time, or am I special?” Hux moaned.

“You’re just special. And you asked me not to go.”

Hux blinked into his palms. Of course he’d said that.

“I see. Did I say anything else?”

Hux didn’t need to look up to know Ren was smiling wryly at him.

“You said a lot of things. I don’t need to embarrass you.”

“No. No you don’t.”

“Hux.”

The softness in Ren’s voice made Hux look over at him. His expression was curious, and just as soft as his voice. It was uncommon, and pleasant to look at.

“Do you remember when we were on the side of the road?”

“I do,” Hux said, trying not to keep his voice passive.

“I like you too, you know.” Hux grimaced, disbelieving. “I do. I’m not making fun of you.”

“Yes, well,” Hux said. As if that was adequate. He glanced away. He felt like he knew what Ren was going to do next, and he wasn’t surprised when he was tugged backward until his head hit his pillows. He wasn’t surprised when Ren climbed over him, putting his hands on either side of Hux’s head. He wasn’t surprised when his own breath caught in his chest at the proximity, when his hands automatically latched around Ren’s wrists. He swallowed hard.

“Is it okay if I kiss you?”

Hux snorted.

“So pinning me is fair game, but kissing has to be permis--”

Hux’s words were cut short by Ren’s lips against his, and he groaned into the kiss, tightening his grip around Ren’s wrists and arching up against his body. Ren gasped and bit at Hux’s lower lip gently, running his tongue over it and slipping it into Hux’s willing mouth. Hux felt like he could kiss Ren until he died and never get sick of it. He tasted like toothpaste. He must have borrowed Hux’s toothbrush. Ass.

Ren broke away with a gasp and leaned his forehead against Hux’s.

“Can we deal with the whole date rape thing tomorrow? It’s Saturday and I want to make pancakes.”

“Pancakes sound good,” Hux murmured. He began to mentally approach the storm of problems he was going to have later in the day, but if he didn’t pick up his phone for an hour, he could at least have pancakes. “But they have to be blueberry.”

 

“Picky fuck.”

“Total ass.”

“I hate you.”

“I hate you too, Ren.”


End file.
